Sunday, April 12, 2020

Stinky Skunk




Stinky Skunk watched the boy kicking stones and splashing in the puddles. He was moving closer and closer to where Stinky was hiding. Stinky lifted his tail, ready to react if the boy found him … he knew this child. He liked to collect things. Stinky didn’t want to end up in his collection, like Pickles once had. The boy jumped in another puddle, splashing mud and water up onto his shirt. He was about to jump again, bending his knees and preparing to leap in the air, when he stopped. 

“Kitty…” The boy took a step towards the bush.

“Caleb, time to go inside!”

A girl took the boy by the hand and pulled him towards the house. “Look at how muddy you are.” She sniffed the air. “And stinky. Now I have to give you a bath.”

“But I don’t want a bath, Sarwah. I like being muddy and stinky.”

“Well no one else enjoys it,” the girl laughed. “Now come on, mom’s bringing pizza home.”

Stinky watched the two disappear into the house and then came out of the bushes. He had to agree … being stinky was fun. Speaking of stink … the skunk sniffed the air. He smelled something yummy. There was a garbage can by the side of the house. The lid was up and the smell was coming from inside.

“Hmmm, let’s see what delicious treat waits me inside.”

“Please tell me you aren’t going to eat garbage.” Pickles said, hopping out from behind the can.

“Of course I am,” Stinky said. “You know the saying, garbage today, food tomorrow.”

“I’ve never heard that saying,” Pickles said.

“Besides,” Stinky said, climbing up onto the side of the garbage container, “you eat flies. Who are you to judge?”

“You eat flies too.”


“And fruit, insects, yummy yummy bacon … the things humans throw out … and, oh my ... YES! EGGS!” Stinky dove into the pile of garbage … or paradise. It’s all in the eye of the beholder.

“Eggs?” Pickles croaked.

Stinky stuck his head up. He had an egg shell in his mouth. “Rotten eggs. The best kind.”

The End

Friday, April 10, 2020

I Think I'm Going To Be Silly Today

I Think I'm Going to be Silly Today
by L. Hollar




I think I’m going to be silly today
And do things  in a different way.
I’ll put my shoes on the wrong feet,
Different colors, one blue, one pink.

I’ll eat my sandwich wrong side out,
Jump up and down and give a shout.
I’ll try on mamas’dressing gown
And watch television upside down.

Since today I’m being silly,
I’ll run around all willy-nilly.
I’ll find my friends, Lulu and Nogs,
So we can hop around like frogs.

When I go to bed tonight,
I’ll end my silly day just right.
I’ll put my P.J.’s on backwards
And say some silly good night words.

Then I’ll sleep upside down,
Under my bed, on the ground.
Until Mama puts me back in bed
And kisses my silly little head.

Sunday, April 5, 2020

Frankenstein's Castle

Frankenstein’s Castle
 by L. Hollar

High above Monstropolis, 
On the mountainside,
Is where our tale begins tonight,
At Castle Frankenstein.

The castle looms,
Above the town,
Where spooky lights gloom
And eerie sounds, sound

It’s home to Dr. Frankenstein,
 A strange little surgeon
Of questionable mind. 

But Monstropolis is home
To many things strange,
 so what does it matter
If the doctor is crazed?

 Just the other night,
During a summer storm,
 lightning lit the castle,
Revealing an eerie form. 

Then the doctors’ voice was heard,
The chilling voice of the mentally disturbed.

"It’s alive,"
was all that he said,
But not one single heart
 filled up with dread.

Which brings us back to the story tonight
And why Frankenstein’s’ castle 
is lit by ghost light.

After more than a year, 
since first moving in,
The strange little doctor 
is throwing a shin dig.

He’s invited the whole town 
to come see his home,
And meet his new creation, 
before they leave for Rome.

What’s that you wonder? 
Why Rome, you ask.
Well that’s a different story; 
I’ll leave it for last.

The whole town turned out this night,
Witches and monsters, 
Vampires in flight.

Mummies, Zombies, 
Werewolves too
All came out 
By ones and by twos.

Monsters of all shape,
Monsters of all size,
Monsters with creepy, crawly,
 slitherin’ eyes.

They were met at the door, 
By a hunched little man,
Who welcomed them there,
 and said he was Dan.

What’s that?
 Where’s Igor?
He’s gone on vacation, 
down by the shore.

But Dan is hunch backed,
With only one eye,
And can fill in for Igor,
While at the seaside.

He was sent here to work, 
by Monsters R Us,
And does his job well, 
With very little fuss.

At least, mumbled Dan, 
I answer the door,
Which is more than is said 
for lazy Igor.

Now back to my story, 
where was I at?
Oh yes, oh yes,
 on the welcome Matt.
(Sorry Matt, didn’t mean to step on your back.)

So Dan invited the monsters inside,
Including the mysterious Mr. Hyde.
I’m glad you made it, Frankenstein sung,
Grasping the hands of his old college chum.

The two had gone, 
to the School of the Weird,
For the mentally insane 
And the medically feared.

I wouldn’t have missed it, 
Mr. Hyde said,
But first I had to get HIM 
out of my head.

Him being Mr. Hyde’s other half,
The boring and snoring Dr. Jekyll half.
No sense of humor, never any fun,
That Dr. Jekyll, you know the one.

The Invisible Man,
Medusa too,
The Mummy, Thing,
And ghosts that said Boo.

Witches with faces
To fill hearts with dread,
Ghouls, Phantoms
And other un-dead.

They were there to meet Frankenstein's creature,
One more gruesome
than your substitute teacher.

You doubt that, you say,
Well let’s just see, he’s on his way.

All of Monstropolis holds their breath,
All except those, encumbered by death.

The walls begin to crack; 
the floor begins to shake,
And beneath their feet,  
The castle quakes.

Then into the room, the creature came,
Soon to be known, by his maker’s name.

Held together, by wire, bolts 
and a little duct tape,
All the monsters mouths,
Dropped open, agape. 

The doctor had used whatever it took,
To give his new creature 
A monstrous new look.

All of Monstropolis applauded his work,
All except one, who thought him a jerk.

I went to school, with this Frankenstein,
And believe you me; he’s out of his mind.

His creatures not put together, 
very well at all,
He won’t even last 
till the beginning of fall.

But everyone knew, he was jealous
And substitute teacher was just being grim.

So they ignored what he had to say
And partied all night and into the day.

Then before long, it was time to go home
And leave the doctor and his creature alone.

Frankenstein paid the band,
Packed their bags, and said goodbye to Dan.

Then they were off, headed to Rome,
It might be a few weeks, before they come home.

"Why Rome?" You ask again.
The answer is simple, 
My curious friend.

Frankenstein's monster,
well, he likes Italian food.
And he wants you to know,
His name is Bob.

The End

copyright 2020© Lisa McCourt Hollar. All Rights Reserved

Wednesday, December 11, 2019

Kylee Meets Santa



Kylee opened her eyes. It was Christmas Eve and she was supposed to be sleeping so Santa could deliver presents. But she heard something. A thud and a thump. She heard it again. What was going on?

She climbed out of bed. She bet that Jacob was up to something and she was going to catch him. The pesky elf had been doing naughty things ever since he came to stay with them. He was their shelf elf, but he never stayed on the shelf and was always getting into trouble. He even toilet papered her closet!

She looked in on her brother, just to make sure Jacob wasn’t bothering him. Corbin was sleeping peacefully. She heard another thud. It was coming from the living room.

“Jacob had better not be messing with the tree,” she thought. She tiptoed towards the living room, determined that she would catch him in the act. When she peaked around the corner, she couldn’t believe her eyes. It wasn’t Jacob, but  Santa Claus. He was pulling presents from a big red bag and placing them under the tree.

Suddenly he stopped and he turned around, looking towards the hallway. Kylee clamped her hand over her mouth to keep from making any noise and pressed her back against the wall. Did he know she was there?

“Kylee,” Santa called, “Why don’t you come out here and see me. You don’t have to hide.”

That answered that. Kylee stepped into the living room.

“What are you doing sneaking around in the middle of the night?” Santa asked.

“I heard a noise and I thought it was Jacob. He’s really a very naughty elf.”

“Ho ho ho,” Santa laughed, “he is quite the mischief maker. But he’s not all bad. He told me you have been a very good girl this year.”

Kylee’s face lit up.

“As for the noise, I tripped when I stepped out of the chimney.”

“We don’t have a chimney,” Kylee said, but then her eyes widened when she looked behind Santa and saw that there was indeed a chimney.

“Christmas magic,” Santa said. “There has to be a chimney for me to come in.”

“I never thought about it,” Kylee said. “What happens to the chimney after you leave?”

“It disappears until next Christmas.”

Kylee was a curious girl, so she went over and stuck her head up the chimney.

“Ho, ho, be careful,” Santa started to say, but Kylee didn’t hear the rest of what he said because a gust of wind came along and pulled her up into the chimney. Before she knew it, she was standing on her own roof.

“Wow,” she said. Santa’s sleigh was there… and his reindeer. “Rudolph!” She took a careful step and then seeing that she wasn’t going to fall, she reached out and petted the reindeer with the shiny nose. He sniffed her hand and then nuzzled her palm.

“He’s looking for a carrot,” Santa said and he pulled one out of his pocket and handed it to her. Kylee held it out to Rudolph.

“Come on,” Santa said, “we have to get you back inside. I don’t think your mom would like it if she woke up and you were on the roof.”

Kylee agreed. She turned to go back in and then stopped. Jacob was sitting on top of the chimney. He waved to her and then jumped into Santa’s sleigh.

“He’ll be coming with me,” Santa said. “but he’ll be back next year, so he can tell me if you’ve been bad or good.”

“Someone needs to tell him to be good,” Kylee said. “Did you know he likes to swing from the dining room light?”

Santa chuckled and then helped Kylee back into the chimney. “Be careful when you step out,” Santa warned. And then she found herself sliding down.

When she stepped out of the fireplace, it disappeared behind her. “Mom,” she yelled, “come quick!”

“Kylee,” her mother said, rubbing her eyes, “what are you doing up?”

“Santa was here. Look, he left presents, and I got to go up a chimney and meet Rudolph and I fed him a carrot.”

Her mother smiled. “We don’t have a chimney.”

“I know that. Santa has his own. He has to get into our house somehow.”

“I always thought he used the front door.”

“Can we get Corbin up?” Kylee asked. She was jumping up and down, excited.

“I suppose,” her mother said and she started to head to Corbin’s room but then she heard a noise outside. She looked out the window and rubbed her eyes. It couldn’t be…

Kylee ran to the window and looked out. She saw Santa’s sleigh flying through the air. Rudolph’s nose was lit up and it looked like Jacob was sitting on his back. She shook her head… he really was going to be a handful for Santa this year.”

Tuesday, December 10, 2019

Christmas Magic




The cat sat in the snowy road, oblivious to the cold. The snow slowly drifted down, covering his soft fur. Still, he didn't move. In the distance, the sound of sleigh bells could be heard. It was Christmas Eve and magic filled the air.

The cat watched the ground, as a small trail appeared in the road. It didn't travel in a straight line, but rather zigged and zagged across the snow. Yawning, the cat stretched, and then stalked along the path, sneaking up on the creature who seemed unaware of the felines presence.

"You're late," the cat hissed.

"Ahhh!" A tiny mouse jumped into the air, startled by the sudden appearance of the cat. "Maxamillion," the mouse squeaked, "Why do you insist on always giving me a heart attack?"

"Why do you always insist on being afraid of me, Lenny?"

"I'm not afraid if you, but you aren't like other cats either."

"I'm just like other cats. Pointy ears, tail, fur ... Sharp teeth for eating mice." Max leered at the mouse, showing off his teeth.

"Knock it off," Lenny said, pushing the cat away with a tiny paw.  "We don't have long. Santa will be here soon."

"Well there wouldn't be such a rush if you weren't late."

"You try walking through the snow when you're only 2 inches. I couldn't even see where I was going."

"I guess I should just be glad you made it. I haven't seen Jack anywhere."

"He's not coming."

"What do you mean he's not coming? This was his idea!"

"Yeah, that's Jack," Lenny said, "full of big ideas, but no carry through. He decided to stay behind with the kid ... Just in case things don't work out."

"Meaning he doesn't think we can do it. You know, one night a year that Christmas magic let's us talk, and yet he doubts that we can pull off a little thing like this."

"Well, I have to admit, I have my doubts. We are after all, planning to highjack Santa's sleigh."

"Not highjack," Max mewled. "Borrow."

"Forcefully." Lenny said.

"Persuasively. And for a good cause."

That good cause was just down the road, in the company of Jack, a very persuasive, yet timid Saint Bernard. A little girl that all three animals loved with all their hearts. For a moment, Max wondered about the wisdom of what they were about to try and do, but then he thought of that little girl and pictured her face, and he knew he would move the world for her, if he could. 

The sound of sleigh bells were closer and Max and Lenny hurried and hid behind a tree. The snow, which was already shining bright, began to glow brighter, until the air was almost luminescent. In the sky, a sleigh being pulled by 8 reindeer appeared and the two animals realizes a failure in their plan. Neither one of them could fly.

The sled flew overhead, and Max stared in awe at the sight of the jolly man in the seat. What's more, the man was watching Max, a smile on his face and a gleeful Ho Ho Ho booming from his mouth.  Santa pulled on the reins and the reindeer circled the cat and mouse before landing the sled on the ground.

"Max, Lenny," Santa said, greeting them, "I was hoping I'd see you tonight."

"You know us?" Lenny squeaked.

"Of course I know you," Santa laughed. "I know everything about you, and Jack, and how you take care of little Anna."

"Then you know why we are here," Max said, feeling the disappointment spread through him. He knew it had been hopeless. Jack was right to doubt their success.

"No, he was not right," Santa said, startling the cat.

"You know what we planned to do?" Max asked. He felt a little ashamed, but not too ashamed. He loved that little girl and would still try to move the world for her, if he could, just to make her happy.

"Yes," Santa said.

"So you'll let us borrow your sleigh?" Lenny asked.

"Nooo." Santa said, with  a twinkle in his eye. "But I will give you a ride back to the house. It's cold out here and there is a little girl who is going to be missing you when she sees that you are gone."

"She doesn't need us," Max said. "She needs her mom, and her mom is on the other side of the world right now. That's why we need your sled, so we can bring her home."

"You don't need my sleigh for that," Santa said, "Just a little Christmas magic and a little faith. Now hop on in and away we go."

The two animals climbed into the sleigh, but they were both afraid to hope. Anna's mom was supposed to be home for Christmas, but her plane had been grounded because of the snow. There was no way she'd be home in time.

Santa's sleigh rose into the air and flew toward Anna's house. The house should have been dark. Anna and her father should be asleep. But the house was lit up. As they got closer, they could hear Jack barking with joy. Even better, Max's sharp ears caught the sound of laughter. It sounded like Anna.

"What is going on?" Lenny asked.

Then through the window, they saw Anna's mom. She was home.

"How?" Max wondered.

"Christmas magic, cat," one of the reindeer said. And then the sleigh landed on the ground and Santa ushered the cat and mouse out of the sled.  The two said their goodbyes, both filled with wonder, and then rushes through the flap on the door so they could join the festivities.

 Everyone was so happy, hugging each other, saying Merry Christmas, singing songs and listening to Anna's mom explain how she manages to find a plane to bring her home. Everyone was so caught up in her story about a strange man who offered her, and the other military men and women on leave a ride in his private jet, and how that jet seemed to be able to move at a strangely fast speed, that no one noticed as Santa put presents under the tree before taking off for the next house on his list... No one that is except for Jack, who was too timid to even say hi.

Monday, December 9, 2019

The Christmas Kitten





Santa’s head elf, Steve, was working late in the toy shop, when he heard a noise outside the door. He stopped what he was doing and listened. It sounded like someone was crying. Curious, he opened the front door. He didn’t see anything, but the tearful sound was coming from outside and it sounded like it was right in front of him. Then he saw something move in the snow and a pair of blue eyes staring up at him.

It was a kitten! She was all white and that’s why he didn’t see her right away. She blended in with the snow. Steve picked the kitten up and held her to him. She was shivering.

“What is a kitten doing in the North Pole?” He asked.

The kitten mewled at Steve and licked his nose.

“You poor thing, I bet you’re hungry.”

Steve carried the kitten into the break room. There were a few elves in there enjoying eggnog and Christmas Tree shaped cookies. Mrs. Claus always made them for the elves when they were working late. The elves all gathered around the kitten.

“Where did it come from?” Ed asked.

“Can I keep it?” Tiny asked.

“I don’t know,” Steve answered, and, “the North Pole is no place for a kitten.”

“But where’s its mother?” Ralph asked.

“I don’t know,” Steve said, putting a bowl of cream in front of the kitten, “but I’m sure Santa would know. He knows everything.

After the kitten finished the cream, Steve bundled her in a blanket and began the short walk to Santa’s house. Along the way he saw some of the reindeer playing.

“What have you got there?” Dancer asked.

Steve showed him the kitten.

“How did a kitten find its way to the North Pole?” Vixen asked. She rubbed her nose against the kitten’s fur. “Poor thing needs her mama.”

“I don’t think she has a mother,” Steve said, sadly. “I’m taking her to Santa. He’ll know what to do.

Steve continued on towards Santa’s house. The wind was picking up and he wanted to get the kitten back into the warmth as quickly as possible. Soon he ran across Frosty. He was pacing back and forth, looking worried.

“What’s the matter, Frosty?”

“I just brought a last minute letter to Santa. A little girl. She isn’t having a very good Christmas.”

“That’s too bad,” Steve said, “but I’m sure Santa will make it right with her. Santa knows how to fix everything.”

“What have you got there?” Frosty asked.

“A lost kitten. I found her outside in the snow.”

“The North Pole isn’t any place for a kitten,” Frosty said. “It’s too cold, just like it’s too hot some places for me.”

“I know,” Steve said. “I’m taking her to Santa. He’ll know what to do.”

Steve continued on his way to Santa’s house. The kitten was snuggled against him and he could hear her purring. She didn’t seem to mind the cold, but he knew that was only because the blanket, which was a special thermal blanket, was keeping her warm. It was too cold in the North Pole for her to be able to run around and play. He wondered how she had gotten there. It was lucky he had heard her crying.

Soon he was at Santa’s house. Mrs. Claus met him at the door.

“Santa’s in his study,” Mrs. Claus said. “He got a letter from a little girl and he’s really troubled. He said he doesn’t know how to fix things for her.”

“But Santa knows how to fix everything,” Steve said.

“Not everything,” Mrs. Claus said. “There are some things that are beyond even Santa.

Steve looked at the kitten, worried.

“What have you got there?” Mrs. Claus asked.

“A kitten,” Steve said. “I found her in the snow. I was hoping Santa would know what to do with her. She can’t stay here.”

“Well it certainly can’t hurt to ask him,” Mrs. Claus agreed, “and it might distract him for a few minutes from his worries.

Steve took the blanket from around the kitten and then knocked on Santa’s door.

“Come in, Steve,” Santa said.

“How did you know it was me?” Steve asked, as he entered the room.

“I’m Santa Claus, I know everything… or almost everything. There is one thing I don’t know how to do and that is how to mend a young girl’s heart.”

“Can we make her a special toy?”

“Toys are good, but when it’s love you need, it doesn’t fill the hole. She is an orphan and she feels all alone.”

Steve’s eyes filled with tears. “Oh Santa, that is so sad.”

“She asked me to send her someone to love. I could send her a doll… but that isn’t what she needs. She needs someone that can love her back.”

“Santa, I think I have the answer,” Steve said.

“You do?”

Steve held the kitten out. “I found her in the snow. She is lost, alone and needs someone to love her.”

“Steve, that is just what she needs!”

When Christmas Eve came, Steve road with Santa. He carried the kitten in his arms. They made a lot of stops, but Steve never let go of the kitten, holding her so that she would stay warm. Then they arrived at a big house. It was an orphanage and Santa told him it was time. Steve went down the chimney with Santa, being careful not to get any soot on the kitten.

Santa placed gifts under the tree. Then he put gifts in each of the stockings. When he got to one small stocking, he took the kitten from Steve and placed her inside. The kitten poked her head out and meowed.

“It’s going to be okay,” Steve said. “A little girl lives here and she needs you… and you need her.”

Then they left.

The next morning all the kids came running down the stairs, looking for their presents. One little girl came down more slowly. She looked sad and didn’t want to open her presents. She knew they didn’t carry anything she wanted. Then someone yelled, “Meghan, look at what Santa put in your stocking.”

Meghan went and looked. She rubbed her eyes. It was a kitten. She pulled her from the stocking and hugged the kitten. The kitten rubbed her face against Meghan’s and purred.

“What are you going to name her?” Tina asked.

Meghan thought about it. She was so happy, and the kitten’s name came to her.

“Joy,” she said. “Her name is joy.”

Steve never did find out how the Christmas Kitten, as all the elves had begun calling her, found her way to the North Pole, but he knew it wasn’t an accident. He suspected… Snowmen could be very sneaky. They were the ones that delivered messages to Santa Claus, so that every child would get just what they needed, and the kitten showed up the same day that Meghan’s letter to Santa did. But Frosty wouldn’t admit to it, and Steve wasn’t going to push. Sometimes miracles didn’t need an answer; they just needed a little faith.

©L. Hollar

Sunday, December 1, 2019

Forgotten by L. Hollar


Chip was alone. He'd been in the basement with the other Christmas decorations when the man came down and dragged them all upstairs. All of them except for Chip. The snowman had been shoved into the corner when he was put away last Christmas, and the man didn't notice him.

"He'll be back," Chip whispered to himself. "The lady loves me. She'll send him back for me."

It was scary by himself in the dark. Upstairs he could hear the children yelling, and heavy feet moving back and forth across the floor. Dust fell down on Chip, like snow, except it was dirty and made Chip sneeze. The sneeze sounded loud in the empty basement. Chip imagined he heard someone say gesundheit. At least he hoped it was his imagination. It was scary in the dark. All by himself.

Chip waited and waited, but the man didn't come back. He could see a little out the window. It wasn't even winter. There were birds in the bush that covered most of the basement window, and a purple flower that had bloomed. Upstairs he heard the lady ask if they'd packed everything.

"Did you get everything from the basement?"

"Yes dear," the man answered. "All except for the mice."

Then Chip heard a door open and close and the house was quiet. He knew then, they weren't coming back. The lady had forgotten about him.

"MICE!" Chip thought. "Did he say mice?"

Chip wasn't sure how much time had past, but suddenly there was noise in the house again. The light came on in the basement and he heard feet.coming gently down the stairs.

"Be careful," a woman's voice said, "the steps are a bit rickety."

"My goodness," another woman said, "it looks like a torture chamber down here."

"Oh you know these old houses," the first woman said, "but it's dry and has a lot of potential."

"I suppose. Hey, what's this?"

Chip almost squealed when he felt himself being lifted into the air.

"Looks like a snowman. Kind of cute I suppose. The previous tenants must have left it behind. I guess it's yours now, if you want it."

The woman looked Chip up and down. She didn't look very friendly. If he'd been made of snow rather than fabric, he'd probably have melted.

"It looks moth eaten."

Next thing Chip knew, he was outside. He tried to look at the bright side of things; it was snowing and the house across the street was lit up with Christmas decorations. And he wasn't in the basement with the mice anymore. That was good, right?

In the distance he hears the sound of a garbage truck as it made its way down the street. With every squeal of the truck's breaks, Chip shivered. He was sitting at the curb. What if they thought he was trash? They would take him to the junk yard. There were rats at the junk yard. Suddenly Chip wished he were back in the basement.

As the garbage truck drew closer, Chip remembered past Christmases, where he had stood proudly next to the Christmas tree. He'd had an important job, guarding the presents for Santa, as well as reporting back to the big guy himself about the children. Were they being good, were they being bad?  But he'd gotten old. His fabric wasn't quite as white as it used to be. His magic had faded. And that stupid Elf on a Shelf became a thing.

 The garbage truck pulled up in front of Chip and stopped. The snowman shivered. A man jumped off the back of the truck and began dumping the contents of the garbage can into the truck's gaping maw. He threw the can on the ground and stopped to look at Chip.

"Hey Joe," the man yelled, "take a look at this."

"Yeah, what is it?"

"A snowman. My wife has a thing for snowmen. She's got a whole collection."

"It's trash, Shawn."

"Oh not, it's a little dirty, but I bet I can clean it up."

And then the man picked Chip up and set him inside the cab of the truck. Chip rode the rest of the route sitting between the two men. Tears of joy would have rolled down his face, if he'd had any tears. He wasn't alone anymore. And he wasn't going to the junk yard. He didn't know where they were going take him, but as long as there weren't rats, and it wasn't a dark basement he was good with that.